Busting the Myth that Self-Care is Selfish: 10-Week Self-Care Challenge, Week # 7

Now that you have just spent a week being quiet in meditation I am going to ask you to add play to your day. Yes, I did say play! When was the last time you set an intention to simply play?

I opened the window here in Central NY yesterday and I could smell springtime. Here we always smell Spring long before it actually arrives. The air warms enough during the day to thaw the ground so the earth gives off this luxurious smell. It smells like a mixture between a clean laundry hung outdoors, and worms. Sorry, it is the only way I can describe it, but it takes me straight back to my childhood.

Strong Spring winds are perfect for kites. Have you ever held a kite string and felt it tug at your heart? It can take you into a magical state that allows joy to wash over you. As the wind whips and spins your kite a huge smile arises out of nowhere. The tail looks like it is dancing. It really is fun. Try it! Week 1, Week 2, Week 3, Week 4, Week 5, Week 6

“We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.” ~ George Bernard Shaw

Exercise Week Seven:

PLAY!  Just play at least a little bit each day. It can be anything at all that you can imagine would be fun. Some people (me included) like board games and cards. Others might bike or fly a kite. Read more

The Creation Ground of Experience: Thoughts

Our thoughts are powerful forces in the creation of our experience of life. You may be able to recall a time when frustration that was based on a misunderstanding completely evaporated when your understanding changed. This is because our interpretation defines our experience, and it can change in an instant. Our only true reality is the present moment, so rather than merely accepting that life is happening to us, we can harness the power of our thoughts to actively create a positive reality. For example, we can choose to appreciate beauty around us rather than focusing on traffic or look for admirable qualities in the people we deal with rather than focusing on the negative. By choosing how to interpret and define each moment with your thoughts, you truly create your reality.

Throughout the day, we can monitor our thoughts to catch ourselves in the middle of investing our energy elsewhere – such as into belief in limitations – and instead pull our focus back to the infinite possibilities of the present. Taking a deep breath will help us center our thoughts on being in our bodies right now. Regular meditation allows us to gain mastery over our minds so that we can still our thoughts to focus on the pureness of being. If we mentally dwell on the past or the future, we may miss the experience of living in the present moment. Setting and visualizing goals is wonderful, but we can bring our thoughts into our current experience by taking steps to create them now.

Our minds are powerful tools that we can harness to create our reality. Through them we move the unformed energy of the universe into form, which gives us direction for our words and actions. Each thought is like a stone dropped into a lake, sending ripples out into our world to affect all they touch. We can choose our focus and how we invest our energy, which gives us the power to design our lives to be whatever we choose in each and every moment.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM

Professional Stand Up Comedy at The Vineyard, April 24th, 2010

Save the date!
Lighten Up folks! – April is National Humor Month and to celebrate The Syracuse Vineyard is sponsoring a night of Laughter and Silliness.  On Saturday, April 24th, at 7:00 pm come join us in the Fireside Room as I host – Silly Business at the Vineyard.  Your headliner for the evening is Nationally Known Stand-Up comic Dan Viola. Dan has worked with Jon Stewart, Kevin Meaney, Steven Wright, Sam Kinison, Has been featured in numerous TV commercials and appeared on The Nashville Network  Tickets are $6.50 and includes free parking and  all the popcorn you can eat.  Plus we will be handing out over 25 door prizes donated by local companies. Email or Call Yvonne  now for reservations at 315-487-3771 and join us for an evening of smart, clean and razor sharp comedy.  That’s 315-487-3771.

Bring your friends and neighbors and join us for an evening of smart, clean and razor sharp comedy.

Yvonne Conte, Motivational Humorist
Humor Advantage, Inc.
4736 Onondaga Blvd., Ste. 231
Syracuse, NY 13219
Yvonne Conte Website
Voice: 315.487.3771
Fax: 315.487.5633
E-mail Yvonne here

A Picture Perfect Day

Dr. Rob’s brother Ray takes a few moments to shares some positive words from sunny Coachella Valey in California.

Riding Lessons for Life #20

Inner Calmness:
While I was training in Wellington, Florida a few weeks ago my trainer really had me focus on inner calmness.  He really had me focus maintaining inner calmness while riding, and especially while jumping. If we get excited or nervous that translates directly to the horse and they will become nervous and excited.  If we maintain our own calmness the horse will remain relaxed as well.

As a rider I’ve known the importance of staying relaxed on a horse for a long time.  What I had to work on specifically was staying totally calm as I started jumping bigger and bigger jumps.  I am a competent rider up to a certain level, but the great thing about riding is that you never stop learning and my trainer is pushing me to higher and higher levels.  I need to jump a 4’6” jump just as calmly as I do a 3’ jump.  My trainer said my job as a rider is to present the jump calmly to the horse and then it’s his job to carry us to the other side.  Again, if I get nervous or excited right in front of the jump then the horse will associate that nervous energy with the jump; when really the goal is to have the horse remain relaxed to the jump, over the jump, and landing from the jump.

In life, we are faced with obstacles both big and small.  I think the trick is to deal with the big obstacles in life just as we deal with the little ones.  Once we can positively and calmly get through the small bumps in the road we are ready to face bigger bumps with the same inner calmness.  Getting nervous will only attract negative energy to the situation.  Remaining calm and trusting the universe will allow the universe to carry us over to the other side of the situation. Maintaining inner calmness when facing obstacles in life is key to successfully clearing them and getting to the other side.

–
Claire Affleck
Claire Affleck Training website
Email me

Busting the Myth that Self-Care is Selfish: 10-Week Self-Care Challenge, Week # 6

I want to congratulate you for taking such good care of YOU. Although at this point you may only be reading about self-care. Even if you are not doing the exercises my intention is that you will be gaining insights into what is possible. For those who have not only read but applied the exercises I would love to hear from you. What has been your experience so far? Has anything shifted for you? Are you able to see how little time it actually does take to focus attention on your needs? Does it easily allow you to reap major benefits? Tell us about your experience in the comment section of this blog. Previous challenges: Week 1, Week 2, Week 3, Week 4, Week 5

I want to turn our focus to week six as I tell you about my new experience with meditation. If you have been with me for a long time you know that I have written about meditation before and confessed to struggle with it. That is until a few weeks ago when I learned Transcendental Meditation. It is a truly a passion of mine now. I feel like I did 30 years ago when I quit smoking. At that time, I told everyone I came into contact with how great I felt because I was not smoking anymore. Now I am telling them how great I feel because I have finally learned to meditate in a way that is joyful for me.

“The Transcendental Meditation technique has been shown to be the most effective health and wellness program there is. Nothing we know of is as effective for promoting good health and reducing health-care utilization and medical expenses.” ~ Kulrett Chaudry M.D. Neurologist

Exercise Week Six:

Meditation as a self-care practice: Spend a little time checking out meditation if you don’t already practice it. Read more

The Truth About St Patrick!

After the dead of winter, St Patrick’s Day is a welcome sign of spring. It’s a day when everyone claims to be Irish. We wear green shamrocks, eat corned beef, watch parades and wear silly hats. It’s an all day celebration. The patron saint of Ireland is one of Christianity’s most widely known figures. Over 3 million people line the streets of NY and 180,000 happy people are part of the largest and oldest parade every year. But how many of us really know the truth about this day of joy?  Let’s take a closer look at this world-wide holiday and separate the fact from the blarney!

It all started at the end of the forth century – not in Ireland, but in Great Britain where a little boy was born Maewyn Succat. At 15 he was kidnapped by Irish Marauders and taken to Ireland where he was imprisoned. After six years, he escaped walking nearly 200 miles to safety. Once back Britain, he had a vision from God to return to Ireland and help the very people who had taken him. He studied more than 15 years and became a priest, took the name Patrick and convert the Irish to Christianity. Folklore has him driving the snakes out of Ireland.  Truth be told, it was a metaphor. There were never any snakes on the island, but he did cleanse the island of paganism. We think of the Shamrock as a good luck charm, however St. Patrick introduced the shamrock as an easy way to explain the Holy Trinity to the Irish people.  Three parts and yet one-brilliant!

The Irish are famous for oral legends and myth, leprechauns and lucky charms and so it is no surprise that the story of Patrick’s life became entwined with symbolism over time. However the truth of his life is a far greater story and one we can all learn from. This is a story of a man  who came from a horrific situation, a small boy taken from his family, enslaved,  who was able to inspire a nation, introduce them to a strong faith and completely change the color green to be a symbol of a nation.  No matter what your beginning is….it’s what you do with your life that really matters. Go out and do your part to make this a better world for those who come after you!  I can almost hear the bagpipes! Happy St. Paddy Day!

Yvonne Conte, Motivational Humorist
Humor Advantage, Inc.
4736 Onondaga Blvd., Ste. 231
Syracuse, NY 13219
Yvonne Conte Website
Voice: 315.487.3771
Fax: 315.487.5633
E-mail Yvonne here

Finding Your Never-Never Land

We all remember the wondrous and adventurous children’s story “Peter Pan.” The story of Peter, leader of the “lost boys”, who could fly, never grew old, lived in the magical Never-Never Land and was friend to a fairy. Peter befriended Wendy and her brothers one night who had grown up never seeing and believing in their dreams or imaginations, something we are told very young to forget and just follow everyone else through life.

Peter showed them, how to believe in dreams and themselves and to travel with with him to Never-Never Land. This was not heaven, it was a wondrous place that also had fear, anxiety and confusion. After all, an arm-hooked pirate and a clock carrying crocodile can be pretty scary. However, it was dream and imagination that allowed the children to fly, belief that saved the fairy and the crocodile that got the pirate.

Remember today, that you can overcome your arm-hooked pirates and clock carrying crocs and soar to great heights if you simply Believe in yourself. With Belief all things are possible and all dreams can become reality. It is time to find your Never-Never Land.

David Ritter

As Good As Your Word: Promises

Ever since human beings could speak to one another, they have been making promises and keeping them or not keeping them. Those who keep their promises are regarded as people of integrity, while those who don’t keep their promises are regarded as people who at best can’t be taken seriously and at worst can’t be trusted. Sometimes we forget how powerful our words are, and we use them haphazardly or unconsciously, creating expectations that are never fulfilled, leaving disappointment and distrust in our wake.

On an even deeper level, there are promises we may have made to ourselves that we don’t remember because they have slipped into our unconscious. An early heartache may have been followed by a promise never to trust love again. Without realizing it, we may be fulfilling that promise and wondering why our love life looks so grim. Upon realizing that we have made a promise we no longer wish to be beholden to, we can perform a ritual of requesting release from that bond. In doing so, we clear ourselves of outmoded connections and patterns, returning ourselves to a clean slate. Then we can resolve to remember that our word is sacred and to be very conscious of any promises we make to ourselves or to others.

We may ask to be released from any promises made to ourselves or others, consciously or unconsciously, that are holding us back from fulfilling our greatest good. We may ask that love, light, and healing be sent to any souls who have suffered from our inability to be true to our word, including ourselves. We can ask for the wisdom to do our best and from this point forward to be true to our word, promising only what we truly intend to deliver. The resulting clear conscience and liberated energy will illustrate this truth: We are only as good as our word.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM

Generate Your Own Patterns: Becoming Your Parents

Heredity plays a role in almost all human development, whether physical, mental, or emotional. We tend to look like our parents and are subject to the same sensitivities they have. We may even be predisposed to certain behaviors or preferences. As we grow older, we become increasingly aware of the traits that exist within us and the clear history of the traits of our mothers and fathers. Our response to this epiphany depends upon whether the inclinations, tendencies, and penchants we inherited from our forebears are acceptable in our eyes. We may honor some of these shared traits while rejecting others. However, there is no law of nature, no ethereal connection between parents and children, that states that the latter must follow in the footsteps of the former. We are each of us free to become whoever we wish to be.

When we accept that our parents are human beings in possession of both human graces and human failings, we begin to regard them as distinct individuals. And by granting mothers and fathers personhood in our minds, we come to realize that we, too, are autonomous people and in no way destined to become our relations. While we may have involuntarily integrated some of our parents’ mannerisms or habits into our own lives, conscious self-examination will provide us with a means to identify these and work past them if we so desire. We can then unreservedly honor and emulate those aspects of our mothers and fathers that we admire without becoming carbon copies of them.

Though many of the tempers and temperaments that define you are inherited, you control how they manifest in your life. The patterns you have witnessed unfolding in the lives of your parents need not be a part of your unique destiny. You can learn from the decisions they made and choose not to indulge in the same vices. Their habits need not become yours. But even as you forge your own path, consider that your parents’ influence will continue to shape your life—whether or not you follow in their footsteps. Throughout your entire existence, they have endeavored to provide you with the benefit of their experiences. How you make use of this profound gift is up to you.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM

You Bet Your Life Book Launch Party

You Bet Your Life Book Launch Party with Laura’s List: Books for Women. Join Laura  Ponticello with author and international speaker, Trisha Torrey, known as Every Patient’s Advocate. Open to the public- it’s sure to be conversational!

Thursday, March 17, 2010
7:00pm at Creekside Books & Coffee
Skaneateles, NY 13152

You Bet Your Life, The 10 Mistakes Every Patient Makes, by Central New York resident, Trisha Torrey. As my mother would say, like a bible, in your home, this book should be on your nightstand. Given three months to live, Trisha misdiagnosed with an aggressive terminal cancer, now travels the country, speaking on an international level as Every Patient’s Advocate.  As a columnist, radio talk show host, she empowers patients to get the health care they deserve.

You Bet Your Life by Trisha Torrey, known as Every Patient’s advocate

Connect with Trisha at www.everypatientsadvocate.com and http://YouBetYourLifeBooks.com

~~~
Laura Ponticello
Live a Beautiful Life : Laura’s List – Books for Women
Visit my website here or stop by my blog here
Laura’s List can be found at www.creeksidebooks.com now on display.
E-mail me


Words Have Weight: Feeling Our Words

Words carry energy and this gives language its power and its potential to heal or hurt. Most of us can remember a time that someone sent a word our way, and it stuck with us. It may have been the first time we received a truly accurate compliment, or the time a friend or sibling called us a name, but either way it stuck. This experience reminds us that what we say has weight and power and that being conscious means being aware of how we use words.

The more conscious we become, the more we deepen our relationship to the words we use so that we speak from a place of actually feeling what we are saying. We begin to recognize that words are not abstract, disconnected entities used only to convey meaning; they are powerful transmitters of feeling. For the next few days, you might want to practice noticing how the words you say and hear affect your body and your emotional state. Notice how the different communication styles of the people in your life make you feel. Also, watch closely to see how your own words come out and what affect they have on the people around you.

You may notice that when we speak quickly, without thinking, or rush to get our ideas across, our words don’t carry the same power as when we speak slowly and confidently, allowing those receiving our words time and space to take them in. When we carefully listen to others before we speak, our words have more integrity, and when we take time to center ourselves before speaking, we truly begin to harness the power of speech. Then our words can be intelligent messengers of healing and light, transmitting deep and positive feelings to those who receive them.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM

Reading For Pleasure: A Whole New World

Every book has the potential to touch the human soul deeply, arousing patterns of thought that might otherwise have lain dormant. The pleasure we derive from the written word is unique in that we must labor for it. Other forms of art provide us with stimulus and ask nothing more than our emotional response. Reading is an active pastime that requires an investment of emotion as well as our concentration and imagination. The words we read are merely a starting point for a process that takes place largely within our minds and hearts.

There are few activities as comforting, relaxing, and healthy as perusing the pages of a good piece of fiction or nonfiction. Curling up with a book and a cup of tea is one of the simplest ways we can remove ourselves from the confines of reality in order to immerse ourselves in the drama and intrigue of the unfamiliar. The pleasure of transcending reality is only one aspect of the reading experience, however. Each time we read for enjoyment, whether we prefer the fantastic nature of fiction, the empathy awakened within us by memoir, or the instructive passion of nonfiction, we create entire landscapes in our mind’s eye. The books we choose provide us with the inspiration we need to accomplish such a feat, but it is our own creative reserves that empower us to use our imaginations for this unique and beautiful purpose.

The tales you lose yourself in can lead you on paths of discovery that take you out of your own life and help you see that existence can unfold in an infinite number of ways. You can learn so much from the characters and mentors who guide you from page to page. Your emotions are awakened each time you read, allowing you to become vessels of the passion that pours forth from line after line of print. Ultimately, the books you absorb – those that touch you deeply – will become a part of who you are, providing you with a rich and thrilling world within that you can revisit anytime you wish by simply closing your eyes. If you haven’t read a book for pleasure lately, try and allow yourself the time – you deserve it.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM

Free of Gravity: Flying Home

As earthbound beings, humans have always had a fascination with winged creatures of all kinds. The idea of being able to spontaneously lift off from the earth and fly is so compelling to us that we invented airplanes and helicopters and myriad other flying machines in order to provide ourselves with the many gifts of being airborne. Flying high in the sky, we look down on the earth that is our home and see things from an entirely different perspective. We can see more, and we can see farther than we can when we’re on the ground. As if all this weren’t enough, the out-of-this-world feeling of freedom that comes with groundlessness inspires us to want to take flight again and again.

Metaphorically, we take flight whenever we break free of the gravity that holds us to a particular way of thinking or feeling or being. We take flight mentally when we rise above our habitual ways of thinking about things and experience new insights. This is what it means to open our minds. Emotionally, we take flight when the strength of our passion exceeds the strength of our blockages; the floodgates open and we are free to feel fully. Spiritually we take flight when we locate that part of ourselves that is beyond the constraint of linear time and the world of form. It is in this place that we experience the essential boundlessness that defines the experience of flight.

Taking flight is always about freeing ourselves from form, if only temporarily. When we literally fly, in a plane or on a hang glider, we free ourselves from the strength of gravity’s pull. As we open our minds and our hearts, we free ourselves from habitual patterns of thought and emotional blockages. As we remember our true nature, we free ourselves from identification with the temporary state of our physical forms. The more we stretch our wings, the clearer it becomes that taking flight is a state of grace that simply reminds us of who we really are.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

Denise Kelly’s Classroom Intention, January 2010

Below is January’s Intention for my 2nd grade classroom. We are now into the 2nd year of doing weekly/monthly intentions with the students in my classroom. We sometimes base it on one of Dr. Kiltz’s Intentions and other times create our own. Visit my Bio to read about how we began the Classroom Intention.

I WILL CREATE MY OWN HAPPINESS!

A beautiful day awakens me.
My intentions this day; I create my own happiness!
A simple thought of the day ahead and the happiness to be had.
I create my world!  I create my happiness inside!
A smile will start my day and create the happiness for myself and all.
A thought I see, and create all that be.
I will create my own happiness this day!!!

~~~

Mrs. Kelly’s 2nd grade class

Rainy-Day Ideas: Uplifting Showers

The simple miracle of water falling from the sky has been interpreted in many ways by many cultures. In various areas of the world, rain was viewed as a nourishing gift, given by well-pleased deities. Rain also served as a symbol of emotional cleansing and represented the unending union between earth and sky. Today, rain is often seen as an annoyance, something to be borne doggedly while attending to one’s usual duties. But the arrival of one or more rainy days can also be interpreted as a signal to slow down and contemplate life. When Mother Nature darkens the sky and causes drizzle to fall, freshly opened buds close and many animals settle into their nests for a period of repose. We can honor rainy days by following the example put forth by the flora and fauna around us. Even if we must venture out into a shower, we can still slow down and appreciate our connection to nature.

A rainy day spent indoors can be wonderfully uplifting. As the rain pours down, fill your home with light, sound, and comfort so that you can fully appreciate the loveliness of being snug and dry during a downpour. Storms literally change the energy in the air, and you may feel driven to follow suit by burning incense or sage, ringing bells or chimes, lighting candles, or singing. You may even feel compelled to talk to each room in your home in order to express your gratitude for the protection they give you. If, however, you feel claustrophobic rather than calm because you cannot venture outdoors, you can clear away negative energy by getting rid of clutter, sweeping away dust, and freshening your up spaces. The happier you are in your home, the more beautiful and wondrous a simple rain shower will seem.

A sheltered spot like a covered porch, sun-room, or bay window can provide you with a wonderful vantage point from which to meditatively observe raindrops as they make their descent to earth. And the pitter-patter of rain on a rooftop or car window can even be a therapeutic and soothing sound, one that reminds us that while the unforeseen will always be a part of our lives, we should never forget that nearly every cloud that comes into our lives will have a silver lining.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

The Warmth of Friendship

Every year at about this time I seriously begin to question why I don’t pack up and move to a tropical island. Just how exactly did I survive last winter? And how on earth am I going to live through the rest of this one?

A winter day for me begins hours before the sun even thinks about peeking up over the horizon and involves copious amounts of coffee. Before I head out the door I do a check of the weather. Is it going to be a ten layer of clothes day or just a seven layer day? I start the layering procedure with long johns (top and bottom), heavy duty socks, jeans, shirt, sweater, vest, coat, Carhartt overalls, insulated boots, hat, gloves, and those little hand warmers in the gloves and in the boots. Now I’m ready for an Arctic expedition AND feeding horses.

I start by throwing hay to the horses. And all over myself. Then I give them their grain, which is usually frozen in the bins. Nothing like hammering away at frozen grain at 5am with a barn full of hungry horses making a ruckus because I’m taking too long. Then I water all the horses. This process usually involves dumping at least one dirty bucket down my pant leg, oh, and water sprays from the hose and droplets of water freeze to my glasses.

Then I clean stalls. I really love when the bags of fresh pine shavings are frozen and I have to use a metal rake to chop it up, which makes me sweat, which causes me to become chilled (or should I say even MORE chilled than I already was?). This is when I make a dash for the heated tack room to attempt to thaw out my finger tips. In the warmth of the tack room I find my “barn” cats. More like tack room cats. I cast a scornful look at them; all warm and snuggly.

This is pretty much the morning routine from about mid November to April. What gets me through? Well, besides wine, I’d have to honestly say it’s my friends.  My ever positive friends.  Whenever I call them to vent about my adventures in the cold barn they make me laugh, usually they’re laughing AT me, but it makes me laugh nonetheless. I try to express my gratitude each and every day for my warm, loving friends that keep my spirits up, my mind motivated, and my body moving all winter long.  Not even the bitter cold winters of Central New York can cool the warmth of friendships!

–
Claire Affleck
Claire Affleck Training website
Email me

Our Evolving Language: Healing Past Hurt

There are many troubling phrases in our language that we use without considering their full meaning simply because they have been accepted into common knowledge. Even as our ideals progress, our language maintains some phrases from our past that no longer serve us, for example: Boys don’t cry; good child; boys will be boys; problem child; illegitimate child; and many more. While these phrases may be used without harmful intent, they are inherently negative. Children can be especially sensitive to such phrases, which may stay with them their whole lives, adversely affecting their self-image and wounding their self-esteem. We can create positive change by choosing not to use these words and phrases as we come across them in our vocabulary.

It is challenging to examine our habits in terms of the words we use to express ourselves, but it is also exciting. Language is an area where we can exercise our free will, creating positive change in the world around us by simply choosing carefully the words we use. It may seem like a small thing, but our words have a rippling effect, like a stone thrown in a pond. People naturally pick up on the way other people speak, consciously or unconsciously changing the way they speak in response. We don’t need to actively try to influence people; it happens without our even thinking about it. All we have to do is choose to be more conscious ourselves, putting to rest words and phrases that are outmoded, insensitive, or harmful. We can also exercise our creativity by creating new phrases that carry positive and loving energy to replace the old ones.

You may already have some ideas about phrases you’d like to transition out of your language, and now that you’re thinking about it you may come across many more. As you consciously decide not to use these phrases, you may feel lighter and more joyful, knowing that you have chosen to drop baggage that was handed down to you from a less conscious time. As you do so, you elevate the language for future generations who would no doubt thank you if they could.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

Open Heart: Returning Home

Spiritual teachers have always pointed to the heart as the seat of consciousness, and recently Western science has found evidence to support this realization. It turns out that the heart has its own central nervous system and is not simply under the rule of the brain as formerly believed. Anyone who has taken the time to explore the heart knows this and, more important, has realized that the heart is the source of our connection to a consciousness greater than the ego. Approaching life with an open heart means that we have opened the door to this greater consciousness, taking up residence alongside it in the seat of our soul. Fortunately, at this time there is a lot of support for this shift energetically as well as practically. To some degree, approaching life with an open heart is as simple as shifting your attention onto your heart.

Eventually you will be able do this any time, any place, but at first it may help to try it in a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. Simply sit with your eyes closed and draw your breath into your heart. As your breath expands your chest cavity, your heart expands and opens. You may feel tenderness or sadness in your heart, and you may also feel relief. Any emotions that arise can be effectively witnessed and healed through the meditation process, which benefits both your physical heart and your energetic heart. The more you practice, the more you will find your heart opening to your own presence and to all the situations your life brings.

When we open our hearts, they may feel tender and vulnerable, which simply means that they need our loving attention as we cleanse and heal them of past hurts and blockages. This process asks us to practice some of the heart’s greatest lessons—patience, compassion, and unconditional love. On the other hand, we may take up residence as effortlessly as a bird returns to its nest. Either way, approaching life with an open heart simply means returning to our true home.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

Loving the Light: Color Therapy

The wondrous displays of color that define the world around us are manifestations of light and, as such, each possesses a unique frequency. The attraction we feel to certain colors is not a matter of pure chance; we experience the beneficial affects of color even while blindfolded. We are naturally drawn to those colors that lift our mood, expand consciousness, and restore health. Color therapy, also known as chromo therapy, allows us to harness the power of individual color frequencies to heal the body, positively influence our emotions, and achieve a renewed sense of inner harmony through sympathetic resonance. Colors do not directly affect the composition of our physical, mental, or aura, but they noninvasively alter the vibrational characteristics of diverse elements of the self so that each resonates at its proper healthy frequency.

It is easy to overlook the colors that saturate our personal and professional environments. Yet these, whether in the form of the paint on our walls or the clothing we wear, can influence our thoughts, behaviors, and feelings to an extraordinary degree. The colors we like best are often those that we need most in our lives, and there are many ways we can utilize them. Basking under a colored light bulb or gazing at an area of color can stimulate or calm us depending on the color we choose. For example, red stimulates the brain, circulatory systems, and first chakra, giving us an energy boost, while blue acts on the throat chakra, soothing the body and mind. And when we do not feel drawn to any one color, we can still benefit from the healing effects of white light, which is an amalgamation of all the colors of the visible spectrum. It is a cleansing color, one that can purify us on many levels.

Human beings evolved to delight in vivid sunsets and rainbows, to enjoy the sensations awakened by particularly eye-catching color, and to decorate our spaces and ourselves with bright colors. In essence, we evolved to love the light because of its harmonizing influence on every aspect of the self. When we pay attention to the potential affects of individual colors, we can modify our spaces, wardrobes, and habits to ensure that we introduce the colors that speak to us most deeply in our everyday lives.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

My Defining Moment

I’ve had my life figured out. I’ve had it figured out several times. Each time, life, has made plans I hadn’t counted on.

About seven years ago, I thought I finally had it all together. Again, life intervened. I was engaged, to be married, to my soul mate, my life partner and my best friend. We had plans; lots of plans. One of those plans was for me to quit my full time job and do what I’ve wanted to do – speak, train and coach! But, then life stepped in. Ten weeks before our marriage, my darling Keefe was taken from me in an auto accident involving bad weather and black ice.

My personal life was turned upside down, as was my financial life. With a mortgage and a child in college, quitting my full time job was no longer a viable choice. I’m not generally the kind to give up. In fact, when confronted by resistance, I often dig in my heels and get quite stubborn. However, in this case, I came close, more than once, to giving up; my dream of my own career and even my dream of a happy future. Fortunately, I have friends and loved ones who didn’t see this as acceptable. With their encouragement and support, I started to see choices. There were really two main choices. I could choose to be miserable (perhaps the easy way out and many would not have blamed me). Or, I could take the gifts of a great and empowering relationship and create a life. Perhaps, it won’t be the life I’d initially planned but it can still be the life that I choose to make it. It is this choice that I have now embarked on. To do otherwise, would most of all let myself down but also it would not honor the faith and belief that my beloved Keefe, my cheerleader and partner, had in me. Read more

Finding Your Tribe: Your Allies On Life’s Journey

Part of being human is the search for an individual identity. Bound to this strong need to establish a unique persona, however, is an equally intense desire for acceptance. It is when we find our individual tribes that both are satisfied. Our tribe members are those people who accept us as we are without reservation and gladly accompany us on our journeys of evolution. Among them, we feel free to be our imperfect selves, to engage unabashedly in the activities we enjoy, and to express our vulnerabilities by relying on our tribe for support. We feel comfortable investing our time and energy in the members of our tribe, and are equally comfortable allowing them to invest their resources in our development.

The individuals who eventually become members of your unique tribe are out there in the wide world waiting for you. You are destined to find them, one by one, as you move through life. Sometimes your own efforts will put you in contact with your future tribe members. At other times, circumstances beyond your control will play a role in helping you connect with your tribe. If you look about you and discover that you are already allied with a wonderful and supportive tribe, remember that there are likely many members of your tribe you have not yet met. On the other hand, if you feel you are still living outside of your tribe, broadening your horizons can help you find your tribe members.

However your life develops after you come together with your tribe, you can be assured that its members will stand at your side. On the surface, your tribe may seem to be nothing more than a loose-knit group of friends and acquaintances to whom you ally yourself. Yet when you look deeper, you will discover that your tribe grounds you and provides you with a sense of community that ultimately fulfills many of your most basic human needs.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

Practicing Non-attachment, Allowing Our Children To Be

Parenting asks us to rise to some of the most difficult challenges this world has to offer, and one of its greatest paradoxes arises around the issue of attachment. On the one hand, successful parenting requires that we love our children, and most of us love in a very attached way. On the other hand, it also requires that we let go of our children at the appropriate times, which means we must practice some level of nonattachment. Many parents find this difficult because we love our children fiercely, more than we will ever love anyone, and this can cause us to overstep our bounds with them as their independence grows. Yet truly loving them requires that we set them free.

Attachment to outcome is perhaps the greatest obstacle on the parenting path, and the one that teaches us the most about the importance of practicing nonattachment. We commonly perceive our children to be extensions of ourselves, imagining that we know what’s best for them, but our children are people in their own right with their own paths to follow in this world. They may be called to move in directions we fear, don’t respect, or don’t understand, yet we must let them go. This letting go happens gradually throughout our lives with our children until we finally honor them as fully grown adults who no longer require our guidance. At this point, it is important that we treat them as peers who may or may not seek our input into their lives. This allows them, and us, to fully realize the greatest gift parents can offer their offspring: independence.

Letting go in any area of life requires a deep trust in the universe, in the overall meaning and purpose of existence. Remembering that there is more to us and our children than meets the eye can help us practice nonattachment, even when we feel overwhelmed by concern and the desire to interfere. We are all souls making our way in the world and making our way, ultimately, back to the same source. This can be our mantra as we let our children go in peace and confidence.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

Sharing with Your Neighbors: Constructive Connections

Many of our relationships can be fleeting or do not deepen past a superficial level, yet these connections, as trivial as they can seem, often have the potential to grow into something much more essential. When we crave community, we should focus our attention on these casual acquaintances. To forge a bond with neighbors, we need to work together with them so that we have a context from which to begin a more mature relationship. Sharing tasks that are part of living can be a wonderful way to become a part of a larger community, make new friends, and lighten the workloads of everyone involved.

Creating a network of neighbors who agree to pool certain resources and share daily duties can be as easy as taking the initiative. If you are willing to take the first step by reaching out to the individuals and families who share your building or your street, you will likely find that others are receptive to the notion. Starting small, with just a few people, can help you orchestrate a smoothly running system. Together, you will need to decide what chores you want to do communally and what resources can be shared. Ideas for community sharing are child care, errands, housework, keeping a joint garden, cooking for the group, and carpooling. For instance, if you cook large meals for four neighbors once a week, you take off four nights after that. As you grow to trust one another, you can begin adding new members to your evolving network or introducing new tasks to your shared roster of duties.

Actions speak louder than words, so working closely with neighbors to ensure the well-being of the group can be a wonderful way to build a sense of community in your locale. Not everyone you approach will be open to the idea of becoming a part of a network of sharing. As you connect with those who do appreciate the merits of such a system, you will discover that others are just as eager as you are to create interpersonal connections that are defined by substance.

~Reprinted with permission from DailyOM.com

The Laughtertude Club: Laughter and a Good Attitude, A Winning Combination!

Are you annoyed by rude, ungrateful people? What are they so angry about?  When you are cut off on the highway or sassed by a store clerk do you walk away cursing them under your breath or do you find yourself praying for God to bring them a tiny bit of Joy? It makes sense to me that if you don’t do anything to fix a problem, you may be part of the problem.

I’ve got a few people in my life who annoy me. They have bad attitudes. They complain about everything. They are rude. I pray for them all – even the ones I don’t particularly like. I’ve been praying for the same souls for years with no visible change. Then lo and behold… miracles. Suddenly the hateful neighbor is a joy to be around, the rude clerk actually gave me a smile and the family member who will go nameless, actually was grateful for something yesterday. I almost fell off my chair. What happened? When you pray for someone you are wishing them well. I think simply sending good wishes their way day after day, month after month and in some cases year after year, they were able to feel that love and move out of their misery.  It’s just a theory. However it happened, my life is easier now that the people around me are happier. Their attitude toward life changed by receiving a friendly smile when they didn’t deserve it, a reassuring hug after a barrage of complaints or a consistent wish for happiness silently sent. Read more